Got my refills early, feeling good. Dad took me to the pharmacy, which is about a forty minute drive away, longer in the crazy rain we’ve had all day today, which gave us plenty of time to bullshit. I told him last night that I’m going back to school, that I’m going to be a psychologist (don’t act surprised) and minor in my other grand passion, art. MOST USEFUL EDUCATION EVER U GAYZ. We talked about that.

My dad has a long history on both sides of the law, more so with the Good Guys, and I have a great interest in criminal justice. We talk a lot about crime. Eventually we were discussing serial killer theories, the Zodiac’s possible naval history, how I don’t think there was a Jack the Ripper and how he thinks it was a doctor whose son married a prostitute and then killed himself. Somehow that turned into dad giving me a classic television line and me replying with another one, and then raunchy Bill Clinton jokes.

Sometimes you just need someone to be stupid with.



Experiencing some pretty hardcore withdrawals already, have been ill to my stomach all day, alternating between hot and cold, and a decent migraine. There’s a quiet though constant stream of gibberish in my head currently that’s making it hard to concentrate enough to write.

It isn’t fun being like this, and compound that with the stigma already associated with mental illness. Yes I experience auditory hallucinations, without my medication and when under stress, but no, I’m not anymore dangerous than any other random jerk-off. I’d appreciate not being given the side-eye like I’m going to turn into Charles Starkweather or drown some babies.

I’m an intelligent, adventurous, fun person. I’m not perfect but I do my best to treat others decently, and it’s bullshit that some stupid brain defect is going to make me the subject of blind prejudice.

My Simple Daily Skincare

Back in the New Years Resolution post, I briefly noted wanting to establish a skincare regimen for my finicky, prone-to-stress-breakouts skin, never really thinking that I’d stick to it. Well, it’s been almost a month now and I think I’ve found an easy enough routine. This works for me because I have oily skin, a short attention span, and my medication makes me so scatterbrained.

My mantra is Astringent, Tone, Moisturize. Ideally it’s done once a day, but stress and sweat from daily life often finds me repeating it as needed. The OCD helps with that, haha. It’s not a full blown compulsion but as I imagine most people with OCD will tell you, anxious people need rituals. Repeating this regimen enough has turned it into something familiar that I can draw comfort from, and I’m hoping that will keep me on the ball.

The links here are to the Walgreen’s site for convenience sake, and because I have an easier time buying from there than I do Wal-Mart. I tried to find non-store brands when I could, so you can find these products just about anywhere.

Astringent: Sea Breeze Fresh-Clean Astringent Sensitive Skin. I use the Dollar General brand, which is like a generic of a generic, and cost me about a dollar. Honestly, when I was a teen and in my early twenties and had a real problem with acne, I went with Biore because Neutrogena and the like was so strong that it would make me break out horribly. That means it’s working of course, because it’s meant to bring all the crap in your pores up to the surface, but it still looked horrible for about a week or two. Now that my hormones have finally balanced out, I only really have issues during my period or when I’m super stressed, which means I can use a gentler formula.

I still love the Biore brand because the products have been kind to me, but now that I’m super strapped for cash, I have to opt for the cheap stuff. Now, this Sea Breeze and DG stuff does work for a woman my age who is interested in keeping her skin clear. It smells just as strongly of camphor as the name brands, it doesn’t at all sting, and I experience no redness after applying. I feel confident about recommending this generic, and I can’t often say that.

Tone: Dickinson’s Original Witch Hazel Toner. I use witch hazel for everything from hemorrhoids to mosquito bites to toning my crater pores, which is why I bought such a big bottle. Dickinson’s is another brand that I trust, and usually you can find very generous coupons in-store for their products.

Another alternative is tea tree oil. It’s definitely less stinky than witch hazel and there’s less of a sting, I’ve noticed. If you go this route though, do be sure to read the label carefully, as tea tree oil has many uses; what you get from Bath & Body for your face won’t be the same as buying a bottle of essential oil.

Moisturize: St. Ives Timeless Skin Collagen Elastin Facial Moisturizer. Once more, a little expensive for us Poors, but just like with the toner you get a lot of bang for your buck; in this case, a whole 10 oz. for five dollars. Considering that with moisturizer a little goes a really long way, this is a good investment.

I apply after washing my face at all, either with the astringent and toner or after bathing, before applying makeup, and before bed. It’s one of those things that makes me feel good because as a little girl, I remember my grandmother daintily applying Ponds cold cream to her face at night (along with curlers and a scarf!). It’s ingrained in my mind as a ladylike thing to do, and even though I’m not exactly dainty or ladylike, carrying on this ritual makes me feel very womanly and pretty.

It’s hard to describe, just nod your head and smile.


So many things are scary at night, especially when you’re alone. And live just outside the woods. And have those huge floor to ceiling windows that just anybody wanting to could smash in with a brick and–

Just one sec, I need a Xanax. Are these chest pains from terror or too many chicken fingers and soft drink? Never mind, just look at this unknown fugitive.

The East Area Rapist/Original Night Stalker/Diamond Knot Killer



What an evil creep. Listening to the message he left on a victim’s machine actually made my eyes well up a bit in terror, and I’m the sort to enjoy urban exploration of supposedly “haunted” places, play Silent Hill/Siren/etc. in the dark, and other ill-advised activities. Not that I’m at all brave, just not easily startled, and everything I’ve seen and heard about this guy has, in the truest sense of the word, STARTLED me.